Music Without Borders - Interview: Farzad Golpayegani

Farzad Golpayegani is an Iranian born musician, composer and visual artist. His music seamlessly blends progressive metal and rock with the traditional sounds of the music of his home country. He is also a visual artist and graphic designer. He has released 3 cds so far and another is in progress. Due to the difficulty in getting his music to the wider world from Iran, all of his music is available for free on his website. Farzad has also just relocated to Istanbul, Turkey. Hopefully this will give him more to share his music with the world. He was kind enough to do this email interview with me just after his move. Please be sure to visit his website.

• Your music blends Iranian influences with western-style prog and metal. Was this natural for you to do?

It had been my idea since I started to compose my own songs. Personally I enjoy many different genres and I have tried to blend my favorite styles including Iranian traditional and prog metal to achieve my own style. I won’t say it hasn’t happened before but I’ve tried to give an Iranian taste and spirit to this type of metal music.

• What is the reception of your music in Iran like?

Unfortunately there is no space for musicians like me. Because metal music has been totally banned in Iran for years. I have had some concerts and releases in Iran but they were about 5 years ago. Even though my songs are instrumental and also have Iranian elements I still don’t have permission to release or perform them.

• Do you play your music live? How is the live experience different than the studio for you?

For couple of years my only chance to have a concert has been playing abroad, which is a bit hard when you live in a country where always there is difficulty getting a visa. That’s why I recently left Iran for Turkey, to maybe have a better situation.

• Do you have a favorite piece of gear? Something you can't live without?

Well, I’m used to get the best result that I can with a minimum of equipment. I have record most of my songs with a low level quality instruments so it doesn't matter to me. The only thing is that I prefer play with a 7 string electric guitar other than usual 6 string.

• Talk about your musical influences, who inspires you? Are there any newer bands you really like?

I always enjoy discovering new bands and there are many different artists that I like but maybe more interesting is when I’m inspired by a completely different song or artist other that metal ones and then its influence comes to my metal works.

• Do you have a regular practice routine?

Actually no! Because I’m busy with different activities and play instruments like electric guitar, steel and nylon acoustic guitars, bass guitar and violin, or work on my visual projects like painting and graphic design, but I usually focus on one of them at a time.

• Describe your writing process a little. Do you use notation? Do you write with other people or do you work alone?

I don’t have a regular process. Sometimes I start composing and sometimes I get an idea for a song while I’m improvising. Also I usually use notation when I need a another player other than me for a record or a concert. And I also write my songs alone, but I always enjoy jamming and cooperation with other artists. I always have some jamming and improvisation parts with my band at my concerts.

• Your website says your next album will be all acoustic. How is that coming along? What led you down that road?

At the moment that record is mainly finished. I always have had some fusion songs or parts in my record but this time I wanted to make a complete record in this way. Maybe some who were interested in my previous records will not enjoy this record as previous ones but I will also have new audience with different taste by this record. Composition of the instruments in this record is: Steel and Nylon Acoustic Guitar, Resonator Guitar, Bass Guitar and Violin. And I have used acoustic guitar with about 6 different tunes within the tracks.

• You've written music for video games, what was that like?

It was a good experience. Since my works are instrumental I can write music for games, animations and films easily and I really enjoy it. By adding some bonus tracks and different versions I will prepare these two game soundtrack projects as two complete records of mine. The historical theme of “Nader’s Blade” and ancient theme of “Garshasp” have been close to my own works, the difference is the epic feeling that I added to them and I used a different orchestration (different instruments).

• You have formal training in visual art, does your art influence your music and vice versa?

Of course. For me working on music or visual art is like saying a same thing with a different language. There are the same rules, elements, motifs, feeling etc, but only in a different shape. I have in mind to start a series of performances like what I had in “Intergalactic Music Festival” (2006) in Amsterdam. It will be like playing back the rhythm tracks of my songs while I play the lead guitar parts, with video art on display during the performance. This idea helps me to perform musically and visually in the same time.

• You've decided to release all of your albums for free. Why is that?

There were not any chances inside Iran for releasing my records and also other options like digitally releasing wasn’t looking good. So I decided to release them for free so at least reach a larger audience. It’s so hard to release the records that I’ve spent years to complete for free and not have permission to go on stage. It leads to not to having any financial profit from my records, but I still love to work on my musical projects.

• There is a hidden track on your album "Three," a really wild take on some classic rock and metal songs. You've given them a real personal sound.  How did that come about?

From the beginning I never have been interested in playing cover songs, until I found a bit more of my own style at my third record. I prefer the cover songs that the one who is playing it gives it a personal touch. For me playing a song from another artist in the exact way that it is, is of no value. Like a fake painting (reproduction) that is painted with so much talent, but still is fake! Having character is more valuable than just having talent to play a song. In that hidden track I wanted to use tracks from musicians that have made my vision when I started to play guitar. It was like a respect.

• Anything else you would like to say to our readers?

I hope to have the opportunity to make many gigs and concerts and to see those who like my songs around the world, and also have a better situation to make progress in my music.

            Thanks so much to Farzad and do check out his site. I hope his move will mean more music and more shows. Maybe progressive music is the key to world peace.

New Blog Layout

If you are reading this you would have noticed that I have changed the layout template of the blog. The new design is easier to maintain and expand and also looks more clean. It features 3 columns (except at the top of the page), which means you don't have to scroll so much to see the links and other stuff in the sidebar.

Hope you like it.

If not, let me know in a comment to this article.

Who do you think you are?

Progulus listener Zaii recently commented in the forum:

Does anyone else get bored of new Prog Bands saying things like "for fans of Dream Theater, Porcupine Tree and Opeth"? It's always the same few massive Prog bands and most of the time they actually don't sound anything alike. It would be nice if they named a band they actually do sound like. I have become so disillusioned by people saying such things that when a band claims to sound like DT, yes and PT for example I immediately become very skeptical and assume they are a not particularly talented group who are just trying to draw in as many listeners as possible by claiming to sound like the biggest band they can think of. When was the last time someone said "sounds like Karmakanic" for example???

This got me thinking again about the difficulty of finding your own sound and also finding a way to tell people what you sound like. You want to be accurate, but you don't want to confuse people. Zaii also made reference to a band that's been spamming the Progulus tag board. Spamming will make people made to begin with, but they also claim to sound like Dream Theater, Rush, and Genesis. They aren't even close. I think it's bad form to try to ride someone's coattails in a deceptive way. If you say you sound like Rush and you don't, I probably won't take the time to find out what you so sound like. I'll probably forget all about you.

Sometimes descriptions of bands are written by their label or promoter. In this case you'll probably hear an accurate comparison, but it will also be of the biggest bands. This is pure marketing, meant to catch the most ears. This isn't necessarily wrong either. I think you do need to speak your audience's language. Once after a Strange Land show one guy in another band (a well known guy in this area) said "Man, you guys have that Kansas thing down!" I know it was meant as a compliment, and I took it as such. But I also said to myself "Huh?!" I'm the only member of Strange Land that listens to a lot of Kansas, and they really are a generation before us anyway. But the guy who gave us the compliment was a little older and probably stopped listening to anything remotely prog in 1980. When people hear something unfamiliar the brain needs to find a place to put it. Sometimes the closest match isn't that close at all. Do we sound like Kansas? Well, more than we sound like Barry White. When I have to describe Strange Land to non-prog fans I'll say Queensryche, Rush, King's X, maybe Living Colour, maybe Dream Theater (if they're metal fans). Listeners of commercial hard rock radio will know some of those bands, and the comparison isn't inaccurate. If I start talking about Pain Of Salvation and Fates Warning I usually get blank stares.

Another problem in describing my band is whether or not to talk about influence vs. inspiration vs. emulation. We are influenced by Devin Townsend, Echolyn, Dead Soul Tribe, and Nevermore but I don't think we really sound much like those bands. Sometimes I want to make the comparison though because I've been inspired in some way by such a band even though I'm not copying their sound.

So, back to Zaii's point, and knowing your audience. If I know I'm talking to the prog crowd I can mention all of the above bands and more obscure ones. It's hard to make the comparison to the lesser known bands, there are so many and such variety. Strange Land is influenced by Fates Warning, but it's later material. We are influenced by Queesnryche, but mostly Rage For Order through Promised Land.

It is a mistake to compare yourself to someone you don't sound like. I think it's also a mistake for younger bands to say "for fans of" when they aren't ready or are not up to snuff quality-wise. If I say "Strange Land sounds like Symphony X" and we don't, you'll be annoyed. If I say "we're influenced or inspired by" then we still might grab your attention. There is too much emphasis on being the next [fill in famous name here] that bands are unwilling to let time and word of mouth work. I find it better to sound like me than to not sound like someone else but say I do. Unfortunately, in the marketing world, "I sound like me" doesn't cut it. So many bands try to say they sound like whatever you like.

Be A Pro

There's nothing like good customer service. I even think it's worth paying a little more for great service. In the world of the performing musician, good customer service is contained in being professional. And by professional I don't mean making a living at it. I don't mean any particular level of technical prowess on your instrument. I mean common courtesy. I mean doing what you say you will do. I mean not behaving like a dumbass. One definition from Merriam-Webster: following a line of conduct as though it were a profession.


For the second time this year Strange Land ventured south of the border to Illinois. We played on the north side of Chicago at the Redline Tap. Cool place, good food. Big thanks to Progulus listeners Iceman and Falcon and their friends and family for coming out. 


For the second time this year, a show in Illinois was partly hosed because other bands didn't show up. Click here for the scoop on the previous show. This time there were five bands booked. One cancelled a few weeks before the show. Two more were total no-shows. No call, no excuse, nothing. We were expecting to play a 30 minute set. We played for an hour. The other band that did show, Seeking, was cool. Glad to meet them.


But what kind of a moron do you have to be to just bail on a show with no notice? I've seen other examples of not being pro. Chewing out the sound guy. Wrecking the venues property. Being rude to the other bands and to the staff. Getting drunk and making a fool of yourself. Sorry, but acting like a "rock star" doesn't make you one. I know I'm weird but I've never thought it was cool to behave like a typical rock star. The closest I think you can be to getting away with it is when you actually are a rock star with millions of dollars and a team of lawyers. Even then, I'll still think you're an ass and your behavior isn't cool. You'll just be better equipped to not care and get away with it. 


We are probably the most punctual band in the state of Wisconsin. I feel bad if I show up five minutes late. We treat the sound guy with respect. We thank the venue and the other bands we play with. We thank the people who came to see us. That's pro, and that earns us the respect of venues, sound guys, bands and fans. That gets people to buy cds. That gets us invited back to the venue. That gets us invited to open for national acts. That gets other bands to trade shows with us.  And that is why we are entering out 11th year as a band. One measure of success in my mind is survival. We've made it 11 years, 3 albums, and dozens of shows because we've outlasted so many other bands. One of the biggest keys to our survival is our commitment to being pro. 

The 5th Season - a diary, Day 1

While writing this I find out that it is quite a little Lord Of The Rings what I wanna tell about just 3 days. Well it is indeed a 'shortened' version and I decided to do one article per day. But I want to bring this down to "paper". So, if you're really bored one day, feel free to actually read the whole thing. :-) Well, here it is:


Friday morning at 7 am. Into the car.
The box of Oktoberfestbeer is there, good.
Promised it to the regulars.
One hour later, at the other end of town we pick up Dario (aka ProgressiveLunatic, aka LordPL) and FluffyGuts. Could have been 30 minutes to go, but some Al Qaeda guy was mumbling something about not wanting beer and an Oktoberfest in Afghanistan, so half of the city, around the Oktoberfest, became a high security zone. We had to go a long way around that... Anyway, we're at the highway now.
At the end of the road, our road, a weekend with 15 progmetal bands and people from 15 nations are waiting! Though the line up is a bit weaker than on the last two festivals, exitement has already taken control over me.

Fluffyguts is a girl from Australia, she popped up at the ppe forum, looking for assistance to trip from Munich to ppe. There was a free seat left in our car.
Gerhard (gdantell) said he might show up on short notice when his business trip will allow it.
Robert (Atomic) was checking out if he could join some 10 days ago, but found out that he hasn't any more work-free days for this year. Bummer.

German highways are a mess, half of the entire way is under construction and it takes us more than an hour longer to cross the border at Roermond. We tried to avoid the Friday afternoon rush in Venlo and decided to hit Barloo from the south, and find the road to Baarlo filled with a massive traffic jam. We leave the road and take the long way around it, navigating with a map on my lap. That's not easy in the Netherland, they have a rather strange idea of where to put signs on the road and where not. If we had to rely on the signs I guess we would have ben completely lost. Fortunately the truck in front of us is from Venlo, and considering that it's Friday afternoon, we guess that guy is heading towards home. The roads we pass sometimes are so small and designed in a way that we're expecting a dead-end several times, even though they're labeled as main road in the map. We find a road sign that leads to Baarlo - thankfully.
It's a quater past four when we reach the castle, our accommodation. Casteel DeBerckt is kind of a hotel and they have a deal with progpower, everyone who orders a package deal for progpower also books bed and breakfast at the castle for a pretty fair price. And it is indeed 'bed', not 'room'. They simply fill their rooms with progpower people, noone has his own room there. If you come alone, you'll end up sleeping in a room with absolutely unknown people, unless you told the progpower staff who you wanna join rooms with. We did that.
When we enter the courtyard, a couple of black t-shirts are already there, sitting in a circle around some beer and an ipod with speaker application, with - of course - Devin Townsend playing. The regulars. When they gather, they are mostly always making a circle. They see us coming, with the box of beer, and welcome us, shouting out "It's the Geeermaaans", raising their beer cans.

At the entrance of the castle they have exposed a room plan this year, but the lady who welcomes us still is confused because Fluffyguts is in a different room than Dario and me. We help her in pointing at our names on the plan. I should mention that they don't have a reception at the castle, you just get in and wait on the corridor until some staff comes along. Something like the castle would be impossible in Germany, a hotel without a reception, only functional furnishing that lacks any kind of design, no bar. I know, Dutch hotels are different to the ones I've ever been anywhere else. But still, the castle is a great place.
Entering our room we find Gary (Cyberfloat) and Simon (jimmyjoint) hanging out, just as expected. The Brits always go into their room and only get out when they're leaving the hotel. Ok, Let's hug! It has been an entire year. Before I can pull off my jacket Gary is holding a bottle of Jamesson under my nose. Ah dammit, let the party begin!
Wait, six beds in our room? Weird... looks like they've messed up the reservation and we're having spare beds. And one window is broken. Wait... there were two people in the room, a window is broken, three empty bottles of beer at the table. Not two, not four, but three. Hey guys did you....?

Grabbing all we need for the festival, print of booking confirmation, torch (2 km to walk back at night, no lights on the road...), we go down to the courtyard, make the circle of the regulars a little bigger and thankfully receive some beer. Finally, the travel is over. Hanging out, chatting and relaxing. Marcel tells me that they don't know which rooms they're in. I talk about the exposed plan, but he says that some are still on the road or even in the air. I don't get the point, but don't want to get into it too detailed now...
After a little while it's already time to get up and leave the castle. We stand up... and stand... and stand.... I start walking slowly, Dario wonders about it and I say "it's time to get this thing moving". That helped. Slowly the trail of the black t-shirts is heading it's way. Watch out Baarlo, we're comming!
A car is speeding down the road and almost hits 2 of the black t-shirts. Fool, it's progpower, don't you know you ought to use another road?? Another car aproaches, more carefully. When it reaches us, growling from inside, hands out of the windows. They'll be there faster... cheaters!
Simon, Gary and me are not talking much, as usual. Dario, as usual, talks. And talks. And talks. Glad he does. He's doing the talk for us all...
We reach Baarlo, reach the venue and pass by. We're heading towards the great chinese restaurant right before the show starts. A tradition. It simply is funny seeing them being scared behind their desk when the long haired mob of black t-shirts arrives, aproximate 30 of us. We cross the mainroad 20 meters beneath the traffic lights. We're proggers. Using the traffic lights would be mainstream, wouldn't it?
At the restaurant, the cheaters are already there, Asians are praying, the bigger tables get occupied by the regulars, we're adviced to use the next one. We thankfully sit down and Gary stands there... crying. What's up? Oh, it's four seats and we're five. He prepares himself to sit alone at the next table. Damn poor guy. We decide to mess up this whole place and Gary takes his chair to our table, at the front end of it.
Gary used to tell me about chilly festivals, chilly chocolate, chilly jam etc through the entire year. Now while eating chinese food, they all do stop chewing, breath in, reach for beer, drink, breath again, start searching for little red vegetables (paprikas?) in this delicious dish. I don't really think it's hot at all; I even added some chilly sauce to it, and still... too mild, European... well...
After a very delicious - mild - dinner and some chat we gotta leave, queue up at the counter for paying. Another mess at the restaurant. And it takes quite long, although nobody had else then buffet and one or two beers.

Going back, crossing the main road, but at the traffic lights. Huh??? Why that? Oh, ah, our English friends are leading the trail...
We aim the festival. Walking through Baarlo. Church bell rings, windows get closed, some kids are taken off the streets panically....
[soundtrack advice: establish this cut with a harmonica melody in 9/4 and add a dramatic church bell to the cut]
WE HIT IT!!!! The holy place! The venue! Sjiwa!!! (On all other 362 days of the year it's just the local youth club...)
At the entrance we queue up again. His holiness Rene, the man who organizes this every year, hands out the tickets personally. And that's quite due! It's a ritual. You hand over the ticket confirmation, Rene browses the stack of envelopes for your name and hands out yours. You receive it humbly and your prog aura expands to the measure of our planet and blesses entire mankind withing 5 seconds. And collapses back to a little bigger than normal size. Woossshhhh
It's strange somehow. After such a tight day I'm finally at the venue, and still I don't feel like having arrived. Next task is exchanging. You gotta give them Euros for some kind of Sjiwa currency, some plastic coins. They won't give you beer or anything for real money. Ah yes, the beer. small one is 0,2 liters, big one 0,4 liters. I tried to tell them that, where I come from, a big beer is actually one entire liter, but they never seemed to have any use for that information....
A small - very small - beer in hand I'm at the merch stand, the guy welcomes me and we chat a bit. Being here for the third year, even he already knows my face. I want an Andromeda t-shirt, size M, so I better get one at the beginning. No. They don't have one. That is always a problem at the end of a year he says. Almost pissed, I feel like shouting out to all bands "make more of the most common sizes!!!!!!!!!" Well, I take L then, telling myself that L is good in winter.
No band has played yet but I already have a merch bag. Including a progpower poster. Hehe...

Cirrha Niva is the band that starts this years festival. A dutch band that already has their 5th album out. I did not know about them before they were announced for progpower. Their music is dark, a bit depressive, but aggressive. No grunts - thankfully - the singer is a shouter, not taking much care of hitting the proper note for the sake of shouting, but he's never out of key. Their music is nothing special, pretty generic in style, though most bands do grunt in this genre.
I takes a bit until I notice that there is no bass player. He couldn't come, so they taped the bass and now play to the 'tape'.
The sound is not good. It's hard to seperate the instruments, the bass track is so silent, yes, unaudible for long sections of their gig.
The bands stage approach is a bit stiff, yet uncertain, but we, the audience are too. It seems we all need a bit of time for settling. Musicwise a good start of the festival, they do a good job in warming us up.
In the break I'm finally relaxed and do some talk here, some there.


Cloudscape is the second band. Number three in my personal favourites of this years bands. I like their style of "Sweden metal goes prog". They go on stage and just start, whithout any need of warming up. Some little feedbacks occur, from the drum mics I suppose; but these are just a worms guesses. The mix changes drastically for several times, suddenly the drums are completely off the PA. The engineer must have drastic problems. During song three engineer seems to have everything under control, but...
Why is it always at progpower that the drums are too loud and the guitars way too much in the background? I mean, we're celebrating a metal fest after all. Remembrance back into 2007, when the gig of Circus Maximus sounded like prog rock.
I'm at the wrong place, gotta go closer to the stage. Yes, in row four the sound is quite ok. (most of the time at progpower there is enough space to be wherever you want to)
The band puts quite some energy on stage. They're having fun playing for us and Mike Andersson is a great frontman, good good show! Sound... not good, sounds pretty 'cloudy', as if Devin Townsend were on stage.
Despite the sound and "Sweden prog metal" I liked their gig.
When they're done, the thank you goes around. Thank you band for playing, thank you folks for listening, thank you Rene, thank you Matthias... (Thank you Mattias? A couple of bands last year did thank him as well. That's weird...)

Talk of this break is the sound. Everybody wonders if the new loudness policy causes this, maybe it's not solvable to produce a good sound at lower levels with this FOH/PA. Fact is, everybody's complaining. Last two festivals haven't been too loud in my opinion. I don't understand this policy, as most people use ear protectors anyway. I tell myself to get arranged with it. I have heard so many crappy sounding gigs in my life, I have learned how to listen concentrated and enjoy a gig.


Headliner of tonight is Andromeda. If someone asks me for a good example for prog metal I point at Andromeda. Dream Theater? Who?
... I find a good place in row two. Nice sound here, I can hear the drums unamped, sounds way better than what the engineer offers. All other instruments and vocals come from the PA and surround me, I'm in a cloud of notes. Many notes! And all coming pretty fast and continuous. David Fremberg is one of the very few who sing on stage exactly as in the studio! Most of the biggest vocal heores in the world can't achive that. They got my body, my head, moving within the first tune, and that won't stop until the gig is over. I never bang head on 4/4 bands, time signatures and overall rhythm must be complex for me. But then I can't stop, I never bang on purpose. I'm wrenched, pushed and hustled in a centre of a continuous box barrage cloud of notes. Thomas Lejons drum breaks are absolutely insane, he is up in my Walhalla of drummers for now and ever. The entire band is. I'm blown! Looking around me I see that the others are too. Everytime someone is extra-impressed by some musical madness, looks around and looks into anotherone's eyes, a hug is next, we front-rowers do bang heads and hug. Marcel, the regular, is air-drumming. Another song is over, another little rest, suddenly the floor is playing techno. Ah, right we've been warned. Local teenagers are having a disco party in the basement. Must it be really that loud? No respect, these kids today. Woooooosh the Andromeda train goes on....
And then they're finished. What? Ah ok, two hours are already over. Thank you, thank you, thank you band, thank you audience, thank you Rene, thank you Mattias. ("He was at progpower from the beginning and did not miss one festival, for eleven years long!")


I feel like I wanna go home. This weekend cannot get any better. what a massive musical event did I experience right now! --- Nah, hey the entire weekend just started, man! Even though there will be no better band than this, it will be fun.
I turn around and look for the Brits - ouch my neck! I can't find them. We go outside and hangout there a bit, smoking, chatting, drinking, the Brits are gone. They left during this ultimate gig? Nuts....
Fluffguts comes along. Haven't seen her since we arrived at the venue. She's having party already. Good! :D
Local kids ocupy the basement, so no afterparty there tonight. The trail of the black t-shirts is heading towards the castle. Passing the local pig farm and an ugly smell we consider shooting some ham for breakfast but give up because we have no weapon. Not even a drum stick...
After a refreshing walk and talk - hell my neck still hurts - arriving at the castle, someone comes out the door and says "hey we gotta find a room where nobody's sleeping, someone sleeps in our room." Confusion... But the gods of prog are kind to us. Rene arrives on his bicycle, has loads of beer, grabs them beers and quickly dives into the downs of deBerckt.
We hang out in the courtyard, confused, not knowing where, what's going to happen. suddenly, on the second floor, there's music, loud music. Some of the regulars climb up the wall and enter the room through the window. When Dario and me come in, the reagulars already made up their circle, but there's place left at the table. David, Fabian and Johan of Andromeda are sitting there, and some more people. Fabian gives me a beer, we hang out, talking loud, because the music - Devin Townsend, what else - is quite loud.


Second row from left to right: Fabian (hidden), David (bald), me, Dario, Johan, and, hmm... was it the drummer of Cloudscape?
Hard to tell almost a month afterwards...


I tell Rene that I find the people of Baarlo cool. They simply bear the annual progpower without complaints and even help people wo are too drunk. Rene says that many of them just like the fact that something's happeing in Baarlo, and the few who don't go on holidays.


Progpower afterparty... drinking, talking music, listening... all are equal. No high noses, egos or something. Being the headliner, the festival master or just someone. We're all here for the same thing and we shall all be happy being together.



I find our British friends in our room, Simon the snoremonster and his endless attempts of trembling the house down.
Five snores and the Friday is no more. over and out.

Identity Crisis

I've been thinking about my identity lately. Specifically, should I have chosen a stage name years ago when I started playing out after college? I'm not getting mobbed by fans and I have my privacy. But there is obviously a conflict between my life as a musician and my personal life away from the stage. Lately it seems the more I express my private life the more damage I do to my music life.

I am a guitarist, bassist, singer, and percussionist. I am a composer. I am a recording engineer. I am an artist. I am a designer. I am a traveller. I am a friend. I am a son, a cousin, and a nephew. I am a skeptic. I am an atheist. Did those last two taint your view of all the previous ones? I wonder if there are some parents out there who would complain to their kid's schools if they new that the music teacher was using music in the classroom written by an atheist. Probably a few, never mind that I've only had instrumentals published so far and I wouldn't advocate atheism in a song to be bought by a school.

Still, I am who I am. People will either accept me or not. If you decide not to like my music because I'm an atheist, well, I can't change that. Music is music and I've found many religious songs beautiful. Especially in the classical world (like Ave Maria by Bach/Gounod). Creativity will find its way in the world, filtered through each artist's experience.

I think instead of separating the private from the public, I'm going to be bringing them closer together. Music is my life. I've never felt like I needed to do something as compulsively. I breathe, I eat, I play music. It's not something I can't do. I feel like I should focus on that and just shut up about everything else. I have to be 'me' to the fullest to be satisfied with my music. But music is not my life. I am more than just little black dots. I can't be creative without experiencing life. I think Neil Peart of Rush said it best:

Back in April of this year, just before the Snakes and Arrows tour, I did a TV interview for the Canadian music channel, MuchMusic. The cameraman placed the interviewer and me in the rehearsal hall, in front of my drums, where I had been laboring for several weeks by then. Some of the interviewer’s questions seemed to angle toward a certain starry-eyed view of my work, especially the touring side of it, and I tried to explain to him that I didn’t consider touring, or even drumming, to be my life.

He seemed perplexed, and to appraise me as clearly jaded and cynical, because his next question was, “When did you start to feel that way?”

I paused to think for a couple of seconds, then was glad to feel the mental light bulb illuminate a true and clear answer. I was able to answer honestly, “About a month into the first tour, in 1974.” That really was when I started to feel that touring was “not enough,” and turned to reading books as a way to make more use of the days and nights.

Partly out of sheer contrariness, but partly out of a desire for context, I often refer to playing the drums, with deliberate disrespect, as “the job”—hitting things with sticks. Obviously it means much more to me than that, and has been a central focus in my life. But still, it seems rather sad to hear anyone say that their work is their life.

Not family and friends? Not reading and writing? Not hiking or cross-country skiing or birdwatching or motorcycle riding or swimming?

Just work?

I don’t think so.

Thanks Neil.

Catharsis

subject: CD Baby loves you

"Your CD has been gently taken from our CD Baby shelves with sterilized contamination-free gloves and placed onto a satin pillow.
A team of 50 employees inspected your CD and polished it to make sure it was in the best possible condition before mailing.
Our packing specialist from Japan lit a candle and a hush fell over the crowd as he put your CD into the finest gold-lined box that money can buy.
We all had a wonderful celebration afterwards and the whole party marched down the street to the post office where the entire town of Portland waved "Bon Voyage!" to your package, on its way to you, in our private CD Baby jet on this day, August 25, 2009.
We hope you had a wonderful time shopping at CD Baby. In commemoration, we have placed your picture on our wall as "Customer of the Year." We're all exhausted but can't wait for you to come back to CDBABY.COM!!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Sigh...
We miss you already. We'll be right here at http://cdbaby.com/, patiently awaiting your return."

This is the standard confirmation mail of CD Baby when you order something there. One month later I send them mail, I thank them for all the love and ask where my cd is. - Nothing... no answer...
Money gone but no Strange Land CD for me, just a love letter....
Put my picture off the wall guys. You don't like the way I look at you and I hate staring at you while walking by and laughing in my face.


Edit:

Day 35 --- an e-mail came in, almost a week late. They messed up the shipping adress. I wonder who's gonna pay for the second copy. Me or my Strange Land. I wouldn't have a problem with a second purchase, just for supporting Sean's band. (for any other purchase it would make me angry of course...)

note to self:
That's not fair, stringray. Every other band would have to give out another hardly produced copy! Treat them all equally and support any amateur band fully!!! grrrr...

Edit 2:

Day 39 --- another shipping has been confirmed by e-mail.
Sean has found out that they revamped their web site and some things still seem to operate improperly. Well, bugs happen....
The global 3 letter shipping company does not report non-delivered mail and seems to simply thrash it. That's a new no-service to me.

Edit 3:

Day 70 --- nothing arrived. I give up.

I'm going to do a second purchase once Sean has the cd available at the German independent distributor. They never annoyed me.

Sean was so kind to provide me with mp3s in the meantime, so I can at least listen to the music whenever I want.

Great cd Sean!